Tuesday, November 8, 2011 @ 10:00 PM
What did I ever do to you? I've never bothered you or disturbed or condemned you. Why? Because you see me as a competition? Many people do, but they don't mock me for my loss. They don't snicker at my mistakes. They don't gloat over my failures. They might be doing so silently in their hearts, but as long as I'm not around to witness it, it won't hurt me. But you, why? I've never liked to compare or compete with anyone, I was only willing to battle my own war. You weren't supposed to be my enemy, yet you kept coming back into my battle against myself. It's my war, not yours. I know you're fighting your way to be better than me, but what is there to prove? You are already better, greater, more perfect.
I've never envied you because I knew everyone has a limit; I know where mine lies. I've respected you because by embedding hatred into my heart will only harm myself. But now, you've thrown away your own dignity. My results may be disappointing and upsetting, caused by the foolish mistakes I've made; the world might view me from a whole different perspective - I may be smart, but I sure am one careless individual. However, no matter how bad I am, I'll never end up being as rotten as you. All the dirty tactics you've used to get to the top, oh, please. People see right through your filth but nobody cares to say a word. No, not because they dare not, but because you're not worth their time.
Perhaps it's because how you're raised at home, but I won't want to be pointing fingers at your family background just because of the way you portray yourself. Sometimes I wonder, how does achieving a higher grade than me pleasures you? Well, you might feel glorious for a while, but what's next? Comparing with others is a common thing; everyone does it - even me, I admit. Survival of the fittest, as the saying goes. At the end of the day, when I've already fallen way behind you, shrouded in the dust you've left behind, what will you do? You no longer have a benchmark, you have no one to compete with anymore, you have no purpose in life. Without setting an aim for yourself, you will never win. You might celebrate your victory over the entire world, but you'll never ever defeat yourself - you'll never win your own battle because you never fight.
Belittling others doesn't make you stronger, better, more superior. It just shows you're weak and feeble; the only thing you could do is to manipulate the minds of others to achieve your so-called success. Of course, I'm disappointed in myself but that's just a temporary feeling. I believe in order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear in failure. Failure is a detour, not a dead-end street. The fire remains burning in my heart. With a little fuel, no doubt I'll come back stronger and ready to fight, battle my own war and await the day of triumph and sweet victory.
He ran. He ran alongside me, and for a moment there, I was as fast as him. However, good things will surely come to an end. An abrupt halt. To my dismay, he gained speed and flew right ahead, toes merely touching the ground. He was faster than the wind, than sound, than the speed of light. I stopped and panted heavily, unable to accept the fact that I've lost. He was already miles ahead of me, a little speck in the distance. I was about to lose sight of him when I told myself, You stopped, but he didn't; he never will. If you don't start running again now, you'll never see him forever. That was all I need - a little push. I ran. I ran again. My legs kicked wildly, defying gravity; my arms sliced through the air beside me; my heart pumped furiously once more, but now with newfound determination.
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Whisk me away