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Ru Min, 19, is a controversial Christian and perfectionist who adores God, Coldplay, pizzas, photography, aesthetic writing, indie music, oxblood, pumps and Luanna Perez. She spends most of her time in her thoughts and laughing at text posts. More...
Bipolar
Thursday, November 10, 2011 @ 11:30 PM
My eyes are already like little slits but now they've become two fine lines because I am so damn sleepy. Time really flies like a G6, I didn't know it was already this late. I slept at 1am yesterday, chatting with a friend of mine on Facebook. Thank God I didn't get caught by my parents or else I'd be so screwed. You cannot imagine how I look like right now. Okay, maybe you can. Very messed up with stringy hair all over. And my face is covered with so many zits. I don't know why lah; exam is already long over. -_- Shucks.

I think I am bipolar. It is so sickening because this disorder causes mood swings all the time and it's really uncontrollable. IT IS NOT EVEN THE TIME OF THE MONTH (if you get what I mean) - imagine if it is. One minute you're at the top of the world and then the next you're down in the pits. My friends told me to do a free test on the internet to check whether I am really bipolar or not...

I AM BIPOLAR.

Proven. Dammit, this is bad. What a catastrophe. Nooooo.

[CLICK TO VIEW]

30. That's my score. The site said, A score of 22 or more, together with episodes of clinical depression, suggests possible bipolar I or II disorder and would warrant detailed clinical assessment. Wow, I am at such a serious stage. My dad said I should go see a doctor; I don't know whether he was being serious or not. I'm not really scared, but just worried. I have so many disorders already lah, highly irritated. OCD, insomnia, now bipolar? WHAT'S NEXT? PARANOIA?! OR SCHIZOPHRENIA?!! Ma de. -_-

Oh, and my dad also said it's better for me to be bipolar rather than schizophrenic. Wow, his optimism never fails to amaze me. And makes me sick to the core. Sick of everything. Sick of myself and the disorders I house. #annoyed WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO? -_- I must start praying about this immediately. Praying helps. Hearing God's voice helps. A lot.

BTW, if you feel like testing whether you're bipolar, here are the sites that I've visited : THIS (I scored 30) and THIS (I scored 48, WTH). Good luck and don't try to be kiasu this time, it's for your own good. Obtaining a higher score than me won't make you feel better.
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