Saturday, January 5, 2013 @ 2:10 PM
It was pretty hard at first because the instant I stopped going online, I felt I had so much free time on my hands, I didn't know what to do. Eventually, I got used to it and did things. Like actually DID things, you know. I actually TALKED to people FACE-TO-FACE, not on FACEBOOK. And spent time with friends in FLESH rather than over Viber/Skype. Also, Indigo by Yiruma, I finally learnt how to play it on the piano. FINALLY. I've been wanting to learn that song since I came back from Vietnam but I was just too engrossed in listening to the song itself and didn't bother to take any solid actions. NVM, all's well now. I can finally play it on the piano, not very good and needs more practice, though. But ahhh, the sense of achievement is overwhelming! I should fast more. :B And I went swimming with my brother the other day and realised I didn't know how to swim anymore, WTH. What a discovery. I almost drowned three times and died but he just HAD to save me. Why lah? Should have just let me scream, flap my arms around in the water and die, right? LOL. Okay lah, I can still swim lah but I'm not very good at it already. Rusty skills. :( On the other hand, I spent some quality time with my brother (aww). We didn't talk crap and joke around as usual but really talked about life. Serious. No rush at all in our convos. I'd never admit it but it was lovely, talking to my brother. :') It's been
Not a good thing but I'm currently watching Boys Over Flowers, teehee. I know it's such an ancient show but I didn't get to watch it; I've been wanting to watch it in a while. I'm only on episode 10 now, heh. So many good actors/actresses there whey like Lee Jung Joon, Han Chae Young, Lee Si-Young and Kim Bum, AMAGARRRD. Must stop gushing about them and their looks, you guys don't need to deal with those nonsense, HAHA. BUT REALLY, THEY'RE SO GOOD-LOOKING, OMGWTHBBQ. I KENOTZ. Ru Min, stahp. STAHP NAO. *takes a deep breath* Alright, moving on.
I'm really glad that I'm not acting like a sloth nowadays or just staying in my pyjamas all day long like I'm bedridden, LOL. Unfortunately, the arguments with them didn't stop. One took place on New Year's Day itself, dayum. It's like we've been living on a different wavelength since last year and IDK whether it's because they're growing old and becoming all emotional/distress/sensitive (yes, sounds about right) or it's because of me growing up and able to form my own opinions about things that differ from theirs and that's why they just can't accept my views. Or me, for that matter. That's why a part of me is silently grateful that I'm leaving because I can no longer stand them. I'm such a bad daughter. -_- Aiya, I don't know lah. I wish they'd just give me a break. No wonder the pastor said this year will be a year of storms and trials. How true. Lord, please save this frustrated soul.
On a lighter note, my friend actually called me (it's surprising because nobody likes to waste credit, lulz) to talk about stuff. When she exclaimed, "You're fasting from the internet? No wonder lah, didn't reply me! You should've told me you're fasting lah! What if someone talks to you online and you didn't reply? You have to tell people you're fasting!" That got me worrying. I actually thought about it before she mentioned it but I didn't think it'd matter. I mean, my friends wouldn't die if I didn't talk to them for a week, right? I bet nobody even wants to talk to me. Like finally, this pest of a Ru Min is gone. Peace at last. HAHAHA. The more I thought about it, the more I felt that it'll be more polite to go online once to tell my friends I'm fasting just in case. I didn't want them wasting their time waiting for my reply if it's urgent but on the other hand, I really don't want to break my fast. :/ When I was about to give in a few days later, I suddenly came across this scripture :
Still another said, "I will follow you, Lord; but first let me go back and say goodbye to my family." Jesus replied, "No one who puts a hand to the plow and looks back is fit for service in the kingdom of God." - Luke 9 : 61-62
Just like that. Two verses. It was exactly like my situation (but mine is at a smaller scale, of course) and God spoke to me. I realised there's always a cost for following Jesus and I should always put Him first before anything else. I didn't break my fast in the end, thank God. And I'm sorry for not replying any of your messages (if you'd even sent any, lulz). I'm not avoiding you so don't be so paranoid, HAHA. Will reply ASAP if urgent.
I'm so chuffed that I started 2013 by fasting, really. It was a good break from the cyber world. Spent time talking to God about my future and all my troubles; He just told me not to worry and find rest in Him. Such reassurance can be found nowhere but only in the Lord. :) 2012 was a terrible year for me (and everyone else, I found out) and I'm sure 2013 will be ten times worst but I'm surprisingly calm. At last, it'd dawned on me that it's God who's been placing problems in my life. They exist for a reason - to strengthen me, to make me grow and to never lose faith. With You as my anchor and the captain of my soul, the thundering storms and crashing waves are nothing; I refuse to sink.
Once again, and never enough, thank You. Cheers to a challenging but rewarding year ahead. x
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