Saturday, November 21, 2009 @ 11:15 PM
Every time we finish an exercise, the examiner will say, "Good girls." She said that to praise us, reassure us, give us fake confidence, I don't know. Warm-up, floor and split exercises were going strong. I fumbled a bit but otherwise, we were good. The kicks, chasse turns and jete weren't that bad. Then, the exercise we dreaded the most came. CHASSE TURNS WITH ATTITUDE. We I began to inhale and exhale loudly, causing the other three to glare at me. I was too nervous! I was the last in the line and after finishing my attitude, we were called to redo that exercise. Oh, no! Die, die, die.
Her exact words was, "You all are older girls and should be able to do an attitude perfectly." One shake of the head. "Your legs should be bent behind when you land, not beside. Go and do it once more." Another shake of the head. Forcing out a smile (the group before us didn't smile and the examiner deducted marks), we tiptoed back to the corner of the room and started over. The inhaling and exhaling continued.
Next, dance steps were two-by-two. Pink (JQ) and blue (Hui Woon) first, then white (Caryn) and yellow (me). Pink and blue was fine, but white and yellow ain't. When the examiner said we were too fast, she was staring at me. Her pale, blue eyes were cold, freezing the already-frozen me to death. I understood it immediately. It's my fault Caryn had to do the dance steps again. Kill, kill, kill. I was like dancing on ice a dancing ice sculpture. Caryn looked pissed. Sorry, not purposely. *kneels and begs for forgiveness*
After the pirouettes (quite okay), here comes the dance. This is one-by-one. Pink (JQ) goes first. When she started dancing a few beats, the examiner stopped her. We were shocked when we heard the examiner told her to start over. She was one of the best! Doom, doom, doom. While I was silently murmuring to myself, the examiner fixed her frosty stare at us. I could just freeze to death there and then! "Turn around, girls. Look at the wall." Oh, she didn't want us to peek at JQ's steps, in other words, no cheating.
Blue (Hui Woon) was perfect. The examiner had no say about her. Then, White (Caryn)'s turn. I don't know what's going on 'cause I didn't sneak a peek at her. I guess she did well, too. The music stopped, I saw her smile at the examiner. Gosh, it's my turn. Time to face my worst nightmare! I crouched down low (the start of our dance), waiting for the examiner to finish scribbling her comments on our result sheet.
It was on again - the music, I mean. I danced cautiously (not a good thing) but firmly because JQ was asked to start over as the examiner said she lacked of energy in her steps. My heart was pounding in my chest and was about to jump out from my throat. Fail, fail, fail. I finished with a crouching position again, and the examiner said, "Good girl."
When I got home, I had a two-hour home-made therapy - Pantene and Shokubutsu bath. It took so long to comb out the many layers of hairspray and gel with my fingers, bringing many clumps of hair and shampoo with them. When I'd finished, the tiled-floor was no longer there and what I saw was a sea of blackness - my hair. I'm practically bald, now.
Well, should I be happy that I'm going to pass or sad that I'm going to flunk? Best be neutral.
Next stop, oral examination.
After the pirouettes (quite okay), here comes the dance. This is one-by-one. Pink (JQ) goes first. When she started dancing a few beats, the examiner stopped her. We were shocked when we heard the examiner told her to start over. She was one of the best! Doom, doom, doom. While I was silently murmuring to myself, the examiner fixed her frosty stare at us. I could just freeze to death there and then! "Turn around, girls. Look at the wall." Oh, she didn't want us to peek at JQ's steps, in other words, no cheating.
Blue (Hui Woon) was perfect. The examiner had no say about her. Then, White (Caryn)'s turn. I don't know what's going on 'cause I didn't sneak a peek at her. I guess she did well, too. The music stopped, I saw her smile at the examiner. Gosh, it's my turn. Time to face my worst nightmare! I crouched down low (the start of our dance), waiting for the examiner to finish scribbling her comments on our result sheet.
It was on again - the music, I mean. I danced cautiously (not a good thing) but firmly because JQ was asked to start over as the examiner said she lacked of energy in her steps. My heart was pounding in my chest and was about to jump out from my throat. Fail, fail, fail. I finished with a crouching position again, and the examiner said, "Good girl."
When I got home, I had a two-hour home-made therapy - Pantene and Shokubutsu bath. It took so long to comb out the many layers of hairspray and gel with my fingers, bringing many clumps of hair and shampoo with them. When I'd finished, the tiled-floor was no longer there and what I saw was a sea of blackness - my hair. I'm practically bald, now.
Well, should I be happy that I'm going to pass or sad that I'm going to flunk? Best be neutral.
Next stop, oral examination.
One down, two to go.
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